updated 8 Mar 2011, 21:09
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Mon, Jan 31, 2011
The Star/ANN
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Dating a married man is thrilling

Sherry* met Adam* 10 years ago at her place of work.

As a fresh graduate in her first job in a different state, she was lonely.

So she welcomed the attention when Adam started talking and spending time with her.

Since he was married, she didn't think anything about it and just chalked it down to friendliness between colleagues.

Then one night Adam phoned her to ask if she could help tutor his children in English as her command of the language was good.

When she asked how many of his children needed tutoring, he told her they should meet up to discuss the matter.

She agreed.

During the meeting, he not only talked about his children but also his wife and the problems they were having.

"He said there were no more sparks between them and that they had grown apart.

"I sympathised with him," says Sherry.

That led to regular phone calls between them, followed eventually by dinner dates.

After four months of dating, the affair turned sexual.

Their colleagues got wind of the affair and the gossip spread like wildfire.

"One of them actually called my family as Adam's wife had found out about us and was devastated.

"I knew his wife suspected the affair as he had told me that she was forever questioning him whenever he left the house."

By then her boyfriend back home had also found out about the relationship and was upset.

"My family then put the pressure on me to get married as soon as possible as they were worried I would end up as a second wife.

"I agreed although I still had feelings for Adam then but I knew there was no future with him."

She then got engaged and obtained a transfer to another state.

"Adam tried to stop me as he is the insanely jealous type.

"During our relationship, he had broached the subject about having me as a second wife but I told him my family would never approve," says Sherry.

Why did she choose to date a married man?

"It was thrilling. I kept thinking why this good-looking married guy was panting after me. He did, after all, have a wife and children.

"It made me feel special as I had captured his attention when I wasn't even trying to. Plus, he was good looking as well as a sweet-talker," says Sherry.

Did she ever feel guilty about dating a married man?

"No, a relationship goes both ways and we were in love.

"We both had feelings for each other. It takes two to tango.

"Another reason why I did not feel guilty was that I knew he could always take me as his second wife legally as a Muslim man is allowed to have four wives."

Does she regret the affair?

"No, it was a great experience. It taught me never to take things for granted, even if you are married."

*All names have been changed.

More stories:

If I don't have an affair with her, someone else will
Dating a married man is thrilling
They were married but available
Your spouse, my partner - why they do it
"Safety in secrecy"


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