updated 8 Mar 2011, 21:10
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Mon, Jan 31, 2011
The Star/ANN
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If I don't have an affair with her, someone else will

ROB'S* affair with a married woman started eight years ago. He met Angela* through a mutual friend and they started chatting over the phone.

Since she felt neglected by her husband, both emotionally and physically, she craved the attention he gave her.

One night, Rob called Angela just as she had a huge fight with her husband.

He did not know about it but he was there for her and that started the affair.

It continued on an emotional plane for three months before it turned physical.

"The first time we had sex, she felt guilty. After all, she had been married for six years.

"She indulged in the affair because her husband took her for granted and was not paying any attention to her," says Rob.

Eight years later, the affair is still going strong.

They have become emotionally attached to each other but they both know what they have is not love.

"For me, it is more physical than emotional. There is no danger of me falling in love with her.

"She is married. What she does not get from her husband, she gets from me," he says.

Does he feel guilty?

"No, I don't. Her husband is not my friend. If I don't have an affair with her, someone else will.

"If you see RM10 on the road and it does not belong to you, won't you take it? If you don't, someone else surely will.

"I don't feel it is wrong because I'm not married and I'm not breaking up a marriage. I'm just there for the emotional and physical support.

"Even if her husband finds out and he leaves her, I will not marry her because this was only supposed to be a fun relationship. It's like the saying, 'willing seller, willing buyer'.

"She did, after all, choose to get into this relationship so she knew the risk involved."

Rob prefers a relationship with a married woman because: " There are no wedding bells, she won't tell and she won't swell.

"It's ideal as there are no responsibilities that come with it. You don't have to constantly report to her and you don't have to buy her gifts as she would have difficulty explaining them to her husband.

"Most of all, you don't have to worry about her asking you to get married. The sex is great. Married women are better in bed. The fact that the relationship is forbidden makes it all the more exciting.

"Even the friends who know about it encourage the relationship.

"Even when I get married, this affair may just continue."

*All names have been changed.

More stories:

If I don't have an affair with her, someone else will
Dating a married man is thrilling
They were married but available
Your spouse, my partner - why they do it
"Safety in secrecy"

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