More young urban couples are going in for prenuptial agreements detailing the rules of conduct for almost every aspect of married life. Gan Tian reports

Luo Zheng (not her real name), 28, an office worker in Changsha, Hunan province, still pines for her former fiance, but does not regret the actions that led to their split. Li Gen (not his real name), 31, and Luo met in 2007, and decided to register as man and wife on Dec 18 last year.

That morning, Luo gave several papers to Li, saying it was their prenuptial marital agreement.

It read: "If the husband has an extra-marital affair, he has to pay 200,000 yuan ($29,300) to the wife."

That was not all. It went on: "If the husband's mobile phone is not in service, he should report to the wife immediately and apologize; if the husband does not come home for one night, he should pay 1,000 yuan ($147) to the wife; in case of a quarrel, the husband should always be the one to apologize."

Li was not amused. He walked out and several days later, sent Luo a short message. "There is no meaning in getting married if we do not trust each other," he wrote.

Pre-nuptial agreements are intended to help determine how commonly held assets, as well as childcare responsibilities, will be shared in the event of a divorce. They usually stand up to the scrutiny of the relevant laws, except for those containing bizarre provisions.

For example, a wife who demanded that she have access to the short messages the husband sent to all his female friends, was said to have violated his civil rights and hence deemed illegal.

Government officer Yang Mi, 28, was luckier than Luo. Before getting married in 2008, she and her husband drew up a premarital agreement which stated that her husband would cook while she washed the dishes, and that she would clean the apartment while he ironed the clothes.

Yang Mi and her husband are among the young couples who have a premarital agreement.

Yang's husband earns about 20,000 yuan ($2,930) every month, but the agreement stated that he would give it all to Yang, who would then hand over 5,000 yuan for his monthly expenses.

The agreement drew no protest from Yang's husband who saw his compliance with it as a way to express his love.

"It can avoid trouble after marriage. Besides, the couple will love each other more, as they know what their duties are," Yang says, and suggests that all women sign such agreements before they get married.

China Daily conducted a small survey of 20 couples under 30 in the city, among whom 16 had drawn up prenuptial agreements. They lay down the rules for almost every aspect of married life - from how to behave in front of others, and treat one another's parents, to who controls the finances in the family.

In all 16 cases, it was the wife who initiated the agreement. While most of the husbands felt it was not necessary, they saw no harm in going along.

When Xiao Zhenguo, 56, an officer worker in Changsha, Hunan province, got married in 1980, there was no such thing as a premarital agreement.

"We treated marriage as something sacred. Divorce was considered a shame, so the divorce rate was very low. This meant there was no need for any such agreement," Xiao says.

According to the Ministry of Civil Affairs, the divorce rate has been on the rise since 2002. A total of 1.71 million couples divorced last year, with those in big cities such as Beijing and Shanghai accounting for the most.

"China's youngsters are facing more seductions, including Internet dating and one-night stands, so they need agreements to protect themselves," Wang Zhiguo, chief marriage consultant at the country's largest matchmaking website baihe.com, says.

"Pre-marital agreements show that people are becoming more mature when talking about love and marriage," he says.

According to Xiao, they first appeared at the beginning of 1990. In 1992, his young neighbor's fiancee demanded half of their properties if they divorced. It triggered heated debate in Xiao's neighborhood.

Wang believes such agreements are another manifestation of a market-oriented economy and while he views it positively, psychological consultant Sun Yueran from the Shangde Psychological Consultancy says they do more harm than good.

"This (making prenuptial agreements) is just like treating marriage like a business. It betrays a basic distrust in the relationship. A marriage is more than a list of dos and don'ts."