How do you know someone is responding positively to your pursuit?

I wish there were a 'definite guide' to this age-old question! It could probably save millions from potential heartbreak.

All I can say is trust your instincts and try not to jump to conclusions. Be neither overly optimistic nor unnecessarily pessimistic. Keep an open mind and stay tuned to the other person's nuances and reactions.

We are usually afraid of hurting people and make up all kinds of excuses even if we are not keen.

The most common excuse used is 'too busy' and if someone is too busy to meet you even for a quick coffee, it just means you are lower than all other priorities that they have and you should really just move on.

However, if the other party declines and yet suggests an alternate date for a meet up, it's a positive sign! Good luck!

- By Ada Wong, co-founder of The Dating Loft

This article was first published in The New Paper on Feb 8, 2009.