updated 2 Nov 2013, 08:59
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Thu, Oct 17, 2013
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The Fan girl
by Aretha Loh

The Fan girl

Pauline Chua, 28, an account manager, has never had a guy confess his feelings to her. But instead of fretting over her love life - or rather, the lack of one - she prefers to seek solace in her J-pop and K-pop idols.

Episodes like these have cooled my enthusiasm for love. I generally don't make the first move or go for dating events - you're less likely to get hurt if you don't raise your expectations.

And until the right man comes along, I'm finding satisfaction in other things- specifically, my obsession with J-pop and K-pop.

It started in 2007, when I attended a concert by now-defunct boy band DBSK. I was captivated and started listening to and reading about K-pop and J-pop bands. Over time, I became a huge fan of these groups, especially Japanese boy band Arashi.

Most of my weeknights are spent on Tumblr, Twitter and Weibo devouring news, videos and photos of my favourite groups like Kanjani 8 and Big Bang. On weekends, when I'm not out with my girlfriends, I watch and re-watch idol dramas and variety shows.

I even upload videos of myself doing song covers to Facebook. Every now and then, fellow fan girls and I will stake out VIP terminals at the airport - complete with life-size banners of our idols - for a good two hours, or scream our lungs out in the mosh pit at sold-out concerts.

My obsession with J-pop and K-pop has brought me great friendships: I've become good pals with fellow fan girls, in the same way that men bond over football. My mum urges me to be less engrossed with J-pop and K-pop because she thinks men won't take me seriously.

I'll admit, there are men who are put off by such things, but I don't think I'm a lost cause. After all, I know of couples who started dating after joining the same fan club. Above all, I feel that a man should love me for who I am - and that includes the fan girl in me.

I used to want to get married by 27, but since I've passed that age, I've chucked that wish. If love comes, it comes. And even though I'm attending more weddings and baby showers these days, I'm not envious or depressed because I love my life right now.

I'll admit: I don't think that having an idol as a 'boyfriend' beats having a real one. I'm definitely open to dating if an interested guy comes along. But until that opportunity arises, I'll continue to immerse myself in the joy that these bands and their music bring to me."


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