updated 16 Nov 2013, 12:51
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Thu, Oct 17, 2013
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Miss Independent
by Aretha Loh

Miss Independent

Amanda*, a 27-year-old media officer, thinks that love doesn't have to be the romantic sort. She finds it through caring for others around her.

"I'm an introvert and take a lot of time to warm up to people. Th at could be why I've never been asked out on a second date - even though I've gone out with seven or eight guys since my undergraduate days. Or, it could be that there was no chemistry between us.

I'm not that bothered because I've found love in other ways - through volunteering and caring for the people around me. After all, my mantra when it comes to love and relationships has always been, 'It's better to give than to receive'.

I've always felt this innate desire to help people. I volunteered to teach underprivileged Cambodian kids how to read and count while I was at university, and it gave me a lot of satisfaction. It also convinced me that there are different kinds of love - it doesn't just exist between a man and woman; we can also experience love through giving. Lots of people have looked at me as if I'm insane when I share my concept of love - that in giving it, we receive it - but for me, that's how it is.

My dream is to do volunteer work overseas, say, moving to Myanmar to help orphans. And the man I settle down with has to respect my passion.

Of course, it would be nice to have a companion, and I do hope to settle down and have kids. But even if that never happens, I won't be fazed. The fear of being single for life isn't strong enough to make me lower my standards of what I look for in a partner. My standards reflect who I am - compromising on them won't be fair to me or my partner.

Finding the right person is definitely more important than getting married by a certain age.

I'll only enter a relationship if I meet a guy who understands me, is honest with me and shares my passion for volunteer work. And until we cross paths, I'll continue to love and receive love from those around me." HW

* Names have been changed.


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