Just can't get enough
"After that night with Harry, I yearned for more. I tried to find sexual fulfilment with my husband, without success – perhaps I was partly to blame, because I didn't know how to communicate my sexual frustrations to him.
We had fallen into a pattern so it felt unnatural to try something new or different in bed. And while I let myself go when I was in bed with Harry, I simply couldn't do the same with Peter because I didn't want to arouse his suspicions.
"Harry and I started sneaking out often to have sex. He was very sexually experienced and knew how to make me orgasm over and over again. I wanted sex all the time, but Harry wasn't able to meet me often enough to satisfy my urges.
"My next sex partner, Lionel*, was an old friend. In the past, he would flirt with me by putting his hand on my legs. I'd pretend not to notice, but my affair with Harry emboldened me to accept him as my lover.
"Each time Lionel and I had sex – usually before my kids got home from school – I'd feel terrible about cheating on my husband. Eventually, overwhelming guilt made me end things with Lionel.
"I confided in a few close girlfriends about my affairs, and they were shocked, because they couldn't believe I could betray my husband that way. I made them swear never to tell Peter my secret.
They advised me to pleasure myself the next time I had a strong sexual urge. I took their advice, and while it relieved my sexual frustration somewhat, masturbation was no substitute for the real thing. It lacked that rush and excitement you get from being physically close to another person."
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