AS A young Singaporean couple, my husband D and I have somehow managed to do things quite differently from some of our married peers.

Through a mixture of fate and circumstance, we did not go down the path of building up a nest egg before applying for an HDB flat, getting married and then planning for kids.

We also do not match the regular dual-income household, or
even the model which has the husband as the breadwinner and the wife as the homemaker.

Instead, here’s our scenario: I bring home the bacon with a nine-to-six job while D (who is 11 years my junior) perseveres with his national service, while looking forward to the day when he can continue his studies and get a job.

Yet, here we are, bound by our love for each other and energised by our unlikely situation to make our every dream a reality.

Though we are constrained financially, we have already been on two memorable holidays.

One trip had us visiting Hong Kong with baby K (born last November), and the other saw us in Paris. And, currently, we are in the midst of renovating and decorating our new home.

I don’t come from a rich family, nor was D born with a silver spoon in his mouth.

Some of our relatives are somewhat incredulous that a couple like us – with one party hardly out of his youth – do not seem to be struggling.

So here’s the question they always ask: “How do you do it?”

A lot of our good fortune comes from the fact that we’ve developed a good attitude towards money. For one thing, we’re not afraid to give it away, whether it is to help others or ourselves. After all, money is meant to be spent for good or saved for a certain cause.

But in a larger sense, even though we’re not rolling in dough, D, baby and I find that we aren’t short of riches, simply because we’ve got each other.

This outlook allows us to focus on what we have, rather than on what we don’t have.

However, that doesn’t mean that we’d go without things that we may enjoy.

D and I love talking about our goals together and figuring out how we should start working towards them. They can be anything from wanting a car or going to an exotic destination.

I know this may invite some scepticism but, for me and D, it is really quite simple. The only way to do something is to just do it.

We see each day as an opportunity to create something new.

The financial process of planning a home can be something exciting, invigorating and creative. One can choose to be either energised by the thought of success, or be daunted by the prospect of failure.

Simple to say but not easy to do? Sometimes, yes. I, too, can be a worrywart about ballooning bills and hidden payments but, after talking with D, what always comes to light is that everything can be taken care of.

Can you eat a 500kg turkey?

Sure you can. Bit by bit.

And while you are eating it, take time to savour the juices and the flavour of the meat. In a goal-oriented society that is so pressed for instant results and quick-fix solutions, sometimes we lose track of the bigger picture.

The doing is also a very special part of the journey towards the having. And, for me, what we have together, right at this very moment, is more than enough. Anything else – trips, cars, and so on – is a fabulous bonus.

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