When I was pregnant with my elder child Jason, my husband once commented about the stench of my sister's pet rabbits' poo, leading my mother to roll her eyes and wonder if he would be able to change his baby's diaper.

Seven years and two kids later, I can thankfully say my husband is a dab hand at changing diapers, cleaning puke and more.

Yes, he got a rude shock the first time he changed Jason's diaper when he realised that a baby boy could squirt urine in his face, but he was better prepared thereafter with a cloth nappy as a shield.

When our daughter Shannon came along, he was happy to note that baby girls do not squirt urine so discourteously. But Shannon had baby reflux when she was born and would often regurgitate her milk after each feed.

In an attempt to keep her milk down, he would carry her upright after each feed for 30 minutes while I rested, and inadvertently became adept at catching any vomit projectile. He would happily report any success at keeping his clothes free from vomit.

These daily acts of love are done without any fanfare. Unlike me, he does not tell seven-year-old Jason and three-year-old Shannon he loves them on a daily basis. Neither does he care for big gestures or gifts from the two kids.

In fact, he doesn't even think Father's Day is a day worth celebrating. But my husband, like many hands-on dads of today, does more than his fair share of parenting and for that alone, I'm grateful.

He teaches English but speaks Mandarin to the kids so that we can provide them with a bilingual environment. And then he switches back to English to remind me to speak standard English to them when I lapse into Singlish.

I teach Jason ting xie (Chinese spelling) but my husband brings the language to life by making up fun Mandarin games they play while chuckling endlessly.

He was the calm one when the doctor suspected I had chicken pox when I was expecting Jason. He was the one who played both mummy and daddy when I actually contracted chicken pox while pregnant with Shannon and had to be hospitalised.

In an attempt to fool Jason into thinking it was me lying beside him at night, he would shave before bedtime so that his chin would feel smooth to the touch of a sleepy three-year-old looking for his mother.

Never mind that it didn't work and the boy threw a fit upon realising he was tricked. It's the thought that counts, right?

While the kids have brought out the best in my husband in many ways, he readily admits they have also brought out the worst. I have never seen my husband lose his temper the way he lost it when Jason was repeatedly rude or careless with his possessions.

Men are lousy at multi-tasking and having to remember a multitude of things that come with having kids makes it worse, or so my husband claims, when he forgets the car keys, wallet or mobile phone.

What is undeniable is that the role of a father has evolved over the years and many fellow mums I meet agree that their husbands are more involved with their kids than their own fathers ever were.

With more women working now than in the past, a father is no longer the sole breadwinner of the family in many households.

With that comes increased expectations from the working mum, myself included. ("If I can help to bring back the bacon, you can chip in with the kids and housework, no?")

And even in families where the man is still the sole breadwinner, he is not absolved of familial duties because many dads today want to be actively involved in parenting.

So I'm sure it's no coincidence that my husband drew my attention to a Financial Times article republished in this newspaper two months ago, on how fathers struggle to have it all.

"It's so true, you must read it," he said of the article which described how it's not just working mothers who have to balance work and family commitments. Men are equally affected, having to juggle their jobs and fulfil their role as a father.

Even as I shrugged off the author's claims by insisting we mums still have it slightly worse, I could see why the article resonated with my husband.

After all, just like me, he is also the disciplinarian, companion and playmate to our kids. Oh, and he is also the laundry guy in our home.

So I must try to cut him some slack and stop myself from mumbling that he doesn't put away the laundry detergent, basket and laundry nets after use.

At least for today.

Happy Father's Day.