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Diva
updated 11 Dec 2011, 10:27
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Mon, Sep 12, 2011
The New Paper
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Dates with boyfriend and mummy
by Joyce Lim

To Ms Anne Chua, parenting these days means doing everything with her daughter - including tagging along on her daughter's dates.

She has been on most of daughter Jenevieve Woon's outings with boys ever since the teenager started dating last December.

She has gone on countless cycling trips upcountry with Jenevieve, 17, and her Singaporean boyfriend who works in Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia.

Ms Chua also joins the young couple for dinners, movies and shopping trips.

The 48-year-old entrepreneur and single mum said: "We enjoy doing many things together as a family. Sometimes I also go running with them. This is how we bond."

Jenevieve added: "Sometimes we go on double dates with my brother and his girlfriend. My mum knows my boyfriend and also my brother's girlfriend well, so we don't feel weird having her around."

Ms Chua's 19-year-old son, Justin, is serving his national service with the Singapore Police Force. Describing herself as the New-Age chaperone mum, Ms Chua said she knows just when to give her daughter space.

Ms Chua said: "Sometimes Jenevieve would invite me to eat ice-cream together with her boyfriend because she doesn't want to leave me alone at home.

"I would say no to her because I know that it is important for her to have her private time with him."

It was not always the same picture: The young girl revealed that her mother used to be very strict with her and her brother.

A few years ago, Jenevieve who is now in Grade 11 (the equivalent of JC 1) at St Joseph's Institution International, was not allowed to go out with her friends after school.

"I felt that she was the toughest mum in the world and I envied my friends who could go out together after school," said Jenevieve.

"My mum fetches me to and back from school every day. Back then, I wished that I could take public transport on my own, so that I could maybe go out with my friends for a while before going home." But things have since changed.

Jenevieve said that her mother now allows her to go out more, even to dance clubs with her friends. She puts this new-found freedom to a strong trust built between them through doing things together over the years.

Cycling is the latest mother-daughter activity they are into.

Ms Chua, who began cycling in 2009, knows the sport well and had no qualms shelling out $8,000 last year for a spanking new, top-of-the-range bike - an Orbea Diva - for her daughter.

They started with cycling at the East Coast Parkway twice a week before driving up to Malaysia to explore new terrain in Penang, Fraser's Hill, Cameron Highlands and Genting Sempah.

During the school holidays last December, they cycled in Malaysia almost every weekend.

They have also taken part in cycling events there, like the Malakoff Interstate Fellowship Ride last year, where they rode for more than 200km over two days.

This year at the PCC Interstate 2011 event, Ms Chua and her daughter covered 500km from Raub to Damai Laut, Pangkor Island via Cameron Highlands and Bukit Merah, in a three-day ride.

Ms Chua said: "The three-hour drive to Kuala Lumpur which we used as our base allowed us to share many conversations together. We talked about anything and everything, from how to deal with relationships to whether she should put on false eyelashes."

Mum feels that it is important for parents to have regular chats with with today's teenagers, who have more distractions than yesterday's kids. If not, a generation gap can easily be created, she said.

What does she think of parents who hang out with their kids at gaming centres at 4am? "If you can't stop them, you do it together with them."

This article was first published in The New Paper.

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