BEING raised in a broken home, Selena Wong, 32, was determined to divorce-proof her future. So, when her boyfriend of six years proposed marriage, she wanted to test-drive their relationship by moving in together first.

“When Ben (not his real name) asked me to marry him, I was more fearful than excited. Sure, I loved him and wanted to spend the rest of my life with him, but there was always a voice in my head that stopped me from taking that plunge.

“I understood that marriage was a lot of hard work and it may not even be for everyone. But I wanted children and a family, so I knew eventually I would have to trust someone enough to take that step.”

Wong moved into Ben’s two-room apartment a month later and they started “playing house”.

“It wasn’t a huge deal as I was already spending a lot of time at his place. It was fully furnished and had everything I needed. S, so all I had to do was bring whatever stuff I wanted from my mum’s house.

“I was really lucky that Ben was so patient and understanding. We split the utility and rent bills; just to get a feel of what it would be like once we were married. We also made an attempt to go grocery shopping and have more home-cooked meals.

“Most of our friends knew that we were living together. But relatives who found out were very against it. I had frequent unwanted ‘counselling’ sessions from nosy relatives.”

Although Wong’s feelings for Ben never changed, their living arrangements were far from ideal.

“I started getting annoyed with little things, like having pets on the bed and seeing socks thrown around. These things never seemed like such a big deal when I was just sleeping over. I would never have guessed that his pet’s fur would be the cause of so many arguments!

“Our disagreements over petty things festered into bitterness and resentment. We started losing sight of who we were as a couple and the reasons we fell in love in the first place.”

Wong moved back into her mother’s house six months later.

“Ben and I are still in a relationship, but we’ve realised that we have a lot of growing up to do as a couple before we live under the same roof. I’m not sure whether we will end up together, but I’m glad we did live together long enough to know that we were not ready to get married to each other.”