I have experienced first-hand the pain of spousal abandonment just like Josephine in the LifeStyle report (When Your Hubby Cheats, LifeStyle, March 14).

I have been with my husband since 1994. He is now living with a woman 10 years younger. They live together with her parents and two younger sisters, and she has openly declared their relationship on Facebook.

Staying faithful is harder with so much temptation in today's world and also because of the weaker moral fabric in society.

During the divorce proceedings, I realised that even if one has a private investigator's report proving adultery, Singapore law does not penalise the adulterer.

It is so sad. There is not much justice for the wife left with the children, broken and hurt. When it comes to splitting the financial assets, the party who is wrong is not penalised at all.

Wendy Koh

The philandering ways of men are commonplace. Most men stray but they may not be found out. This is not to say women should accept betrayal as part of life. We cannot control all situations and conditions but we can manage our husband's behaviour by laying down our expectations.

It is natural for all women to react in anger. It is rare for a woman not to weigh the practical consequences of her decisions. Her focus is always her children, if there are any. She will consider all the sacrifices she is prepared to make to achieve the best outcome for them.

However, the marital relationship can never be the same again as the trust has been broken. Should the couple decide to stay married, they must re-contract the terms of their relationship and engage a marriage counsellor for this.

Women face temptations too but if they can rein themselves in, there is no reason why men can't do the same.

There is no such thing as unconditional love in marriage if you study sociology. It is silly for women to adopt a sacrificial mindset towards their husbands knowing that men are inconstant creatures. If men cannot stand to be made cuckolds, why the double standard for women? The decision to make it or break it is dependent on how much both parties stand to win and lose.

Christina Teh

It is human to make mistakes, and flirting and straying are mistakes that a married person might make.

When the straying party's ways are discovered, one feels hurt and betrayed. Ending the marriage is probably the first option that one considers.

However, in recent celebrity cases, the marriages of Bill Clinton, Tiger Woods and David Beckham are still intact.

A marriage is for better or worse, and it makes sense for the couple to work together to resolve the situation not only for themselves but also for their children.

Forgiving a straying spouse is not a new phenomenon. Neither does it mean the act of straying is trivialised. The love, respect and care of a loved one is the ultimate motivation for us all.

M. Lukshumayeh

Singapore women of today are very strong and independent. We do not need to rely on our husbands for a living. And because of this, we should be able to walk out when an extra-marital affair happens.

There are many women who tolerate their husbands because of their children. They will choose to either forgive him or at least live with the status quo until the children are grown up. These are terrible choices and I am unsure why anyone would suffer in silence and allow her unfaithful husband to carry on. This is not healthy for the children either.

As a businesswoman, I will take my husband to court if I find him straying. I will divorce him and start a life of my own.

It is sad that marriage vows are taken too lightly these days. We need to treasure and appreciate what we have and my plea to all women is, be strong but not too forgiving.

Angelina Lee

I refer to the report Gaining Fame By Infamy (LifeStyle, March 14). Please do not defame and denounce these young 'Jack Neo's girls' for choosing to 'air their dirty linen in public'.

The culprit with the dirtiest linen is Neo, not these impressionable and naive girls. They have taken the courageous step to come forward and 'expose' him and his immoral behaviour.

By doing so, they have opened themselves to calumny and ridicule. Why throw stones at them? In fact, they are the champions of this sorry affair by blowing the whistle on Neo. Other girls might have fallen prey to his spurious advances had he not been exposed.

Mothers and sisters, fathers and brothers, unite. Do not succumb to this conspiracy of silence. When people are silent, they are giving the seducer, the rapist and the molester an unspoken sanction to continue his unspeakable behaviour. Speak up, report him or kick him to the curb, but do not stand by and do nothing.

Wendy Chong, Foyce Le Xuan and Maelle Meurzec, I applaud you. You have done a great social service, do not let anyone tell you otherwise.

Cecilia D'Mello

This article was first published in The Straits Times.