asiaone
Diva
updated 24 May 2013, 00:32
Login password
Thu, May 02, 2013
The New Paper
Email Print Decrease text size Increase text size
People stare, but we don't care
by Jennifer Dhanaraj

"I couldn't catch any fish. "I thought at that time that if I was skinnier, guys would talk to me."

She saw almost immediate results with the diet pills that she was taking.

"I was so happy that I was finally losing weight and I started taking more," she says.

But when a friend's mother died after taking slimming pills, she stopped.

"It was a wake-up call. You just don't know what is in those pills," says Madam Syafinaz.

For Miss Nurhidayah Othman, 29, the wake-up call was a little closer to home.

After taking diet pills for about a month, she suddenly collapsed and had to be taken to hospital.

Miss Guo, 32, who now weighs 105kg, tells this reporter that on top of the slimming pills, she also tried starving herself.

They echo each other when they talk about how they started accepting their figures.

Says Madam Syafinaz: "Why risk your life just because you are different from most people here? It's not worth it."

Miss Nurhidayah adds: "Now, I'm fat but at least I'm pretty!"

Of course, their acceptance of their own bodies does not mean that other people share the same attitude. Public transport can be a pain for them, they admit.

Miss Lee says: "When I'm on the train and I plant myself in between two women, they will give me a long, hard stare."

"But I'm just happy I have a seat and I do not care much about them."

Miss Nurhidayah jokes that there is also a positive side to being fat.

"Because I'm fat, sometimes no one sits beside me on the bus. So I'm happy that I have the whole seat to myself," she says, in between giggles.

Probe deeper, however, and scars from being bullied emerge.

Miss Nurhidayah tells of the time her schoolmates would not help her after her canoe capsized because they thought it would be "too difficult" to pull her back up on board.

The three single women also admit that it can be a little tough in the romance department.

Miss Nurhidayah says that just recently, she met a man online and they were texting when he asked to exchange photos. She sent him a portrait photo of herself and he replied with, "Are you fat?" She only wanted to be herself, so she said "Yes".

His reply? "Okay, bye."

"Well, he wasn't good-looking anyway," she says wryly.

Despite this, the women feel that they've made progress in showing that big can be beautiful.

Miss Lee maintains that, compared to ten years ago, men are definitely more accepting of full-figured women.

"I feel they are more open to talking and getting to know us - definitely a step in the right direction."

It's now also a lot easier for big women in other areas of life.

"A decade ago, it was so difficult to find clothes my size. There weren't any plus-size clothing shops. But these days, there are many Facebook sellers that sell clothes for us big and beautiful women."

"And they are stylish as well!" says Miss Lee, who wore a loose, sheer printed purple top .

"Just because we are fat, doesn't mean we don't want to look pretty."

While most of their friends and family are supportive of them and do not pressure them to lose weight, they often voice concern about the women's health issues.

"But they have nothing to worry about," declares Miss Lee.

"We get regular medical check-ups at least once a year and we are always given a clean bill of health." Miss Guo adds proudly: "Our cholesterol levels are normal."

"Just like skinny people, we know how to take care of ourselves," says Miss Guo.

Related stories:
Being overweight can be attractive, say these women
Men paid just to watch me eat


Get The New Paper for more stories.

 

 

readers' comments

asiaone
Copyright © 2013 Singapore Press Holdings Ltd. Co. Regn. No. 198402868E. All rights reserved.