Ask women what it is like to be married to chefs and it is likely that they will highlight the same things: They hardly see their husbands, and unless these wives head to the restaurant as paying customers, tasting their husbands' signature cooking is rare. So is having him whip up a fancy three-course meal at home for them.

By the time their husbands get home - in the wee hours of the morning - they are usually hungry and barely have any energy left. So, when it comes to the home kitchen, it is the wives who reign supreme.

Some of their tried-and-tested recipes are featured in a new cookbook Cook. Bake. Host. Secret Recipes From Chefs' Wives by Epicure magazine. It was published recently to celebrate homeware and appliance store Tools Of The Trade's second anniversary.

Some of the chefs' wives featured include Mrs Sudarampai Pam Chiang, who is married to chef Andre Chiang of Restaurant Andre in Bukit Pasoh, and Ms Edith Lai, who is married to chef Julien Bompard of Le Saint Julien at The Fullerton Waterboat House. Her recipe for braised pork belly with Chinese rose wine is featured below.

SundayLife! got some of these wives to spill the beans on what it is like being married to some of Singapore's best known chefs.

The women all agree on one thing - marry a chef and you will have to get used to the fact that your husband will not be around most of the time.

Ms Vickie Ong (pictured above), 36, a freelance make-up artist, recalls how she was courted with pretty pastries and desserts such as fresh strawberries served on a plate dusted with icing sugar, by her then boyfriend, now husband Pang Kok Keong. He is the pastry chef and owner of patisserie restaurants Antoinette and Pique Nique. They used to work along the same street, Club Street.

Those sweet surprises, now that they are married, are few and far between, she says. They tied the knot six years ago.

She adds: "He had a lot more time on his hands when we first start dating 10 years ago. His 14-hour days started in the second year of our courtship. It was a rough patch, I was devastated because we barely saw each other and I didn't feel like I was in a relationship."

She now considers him finishing work at 10pm on a weekday "an early night".

Indeed, many chefs will finish well past midnight if they work the dinner service.

Mrs Farah Clague, 36, a housewife who used to work in the hospitality industry, waits up for her husband Colin Clague, Pollen's executive chef, on most nights, especially, when he works a double shift, from 8am to 12.30am.

Their sons, 10, and five, will be fast asleep, but she keeps herself busy with housework or watching television, while waiting for him to get home in the wee hours of the morning.

She says: "In the last 12 years since we have been married, I have learnt to wait up for him, because if I don't stay awake, I won't get to see him."

She recalls how it was only when they were living in Spain several years back, that she saw him more often because of the siesta practice, where businesses close for a several hours in the afternoon.

She adds: "When you plan to have a family, you have to be mentally prepared that your husband may not be around at times. Whoever wants to marry a chef has to be very tolerant and very strong."

For Mrs Chiang, 40, her life was to change drastically six days after her wedding - on her birthday - eight years ago.

Her husband relocated to Shanghai that very day - Oct 16, 2004 - to take on a new chef posting. He had been based in Bangkok, where they had met several months earlier.

She recalls how his words to her were "duty comes first", referring to his life as a chef and taking up new opportunities, and she understood what he meant.

For the next two years, the couple took the effort to make it work with Mrs Chiang shuttling between Shanghai and Bangkok, where she worked as both a magazine editor and a director at an advertising firm.

When her husband moved here to helm Jaan at Swissotel The Stamford four years ago, she decided to quit her jobs and move to Singapore to be with him. They now work together at Restaurant Andre, which he opened in October 2010 and also co-owns. She handles the front-of-house.

Inevitably, when couples work together, the line between work and home is sometimes blurred.

Those who work together, such as Ms Lai and her husband, Mrs Tracy and chef Oscar Pasinato of Buko Nero in Tanjong Pagar, and Mrs Cleo and chef Adrian Ling of Pamplemousse in Dempsey Hill, say it can be difficult not to argue about work.

Ms Lai, 41, says: "It is hard not to bring business home with us. In the end, we cannot help but talk about business at home."

They do not, however, bring their personal matters to work, she says.

"But because we work together, our commitment to food and beverage, and to our marriage, is even stronger," she says. They have been married 13 years.

Ultimately, wives say that in any marriage, it is about commitment, give-and-take, and resilience.

Mrs Clague says: "You have to be very committed, strong and focused, knowing full well that your husband may not always be physically there.

"But knowing that he is doing a job he loves, one that he is passionate about, you can't take that away from him."

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Cook. Bake. Host. Secret Recipes From Chefs' Wives ($9.90) is available at Tools Of The Trade, 896 Dunearn Road, Sime Darby Centre, 01-01A, tel: 6219-7077; and MPH bookstores.