THE Chinese New Year period is that time of the year when my brother and I walk around on tiptoe and approach relatives with trepidation. Indeed, if at all possible, we would implement the "five-second rule" - smile, shake hands, offer a new-year greeting and then disappear.
It takes all of five seconds, before the inevitable question gets popped: "So, when are you getting married?"
The fault lies not in our stars, but in the unnecessary pressure on those among us who prefer to stay happily single, or who are happy to choose life partners at our own leisure.
A recent incident in China proved to be illuminating: A desperate Chinese student from the renowned Beijing University placed an online advertisement offering cash to "rent" a girlfriend for the festive season.
The purpose?
To placate overly-zealous family members who might otherwise bug him over dinner or during visits to each other's homes about his marital status.
This is a classic example of how love can suffocate.
Why do families do such things to their loved ones?
Yes, the question is often asked casually.
But a casual question asked 10 times in the span of a single day amounts to more than mere curiosity or good-natured chiding.
It is tantamount to cruelty, short and simple.
Why the need to force a young person into a corner in this way, no matter how well-meaning?
It is oft said that money cannot buy love. Indeed, it should not, under any circumstances.
That it did in this young man's case is a tragedy not just for him, but for society as a whole.
When love becomes a commodity for hire, the very value of family that people strive so hard to build and uphold is in jeopardy.
My message for all parents and relatives this season is clear: Don't force the issue.
You're not helping the cause of true love, which is priceless and one which will take its own course - in its own time.
The writer is a veteran journalist and editor. She lectures on journalism and helms her own editorial consulting firm, My Blue Ink.
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