One night some time ago, my boyfriend was talking in his sleep. I was worried he was sick or having a bad dream.

However, I found him awake with his mobile phone in his hand. The phone was on screen saver mode, which means it had just been used.

The next morning, he would not tell me anything and that made me angry. But the following day, he admitted that it was a friend who had just broken up with her boyfriend and needed someone to talk to. He did not say anything at first because he had promised to keep it a secret.

I respect his privacy but he could at least have said it was a friend having problems instead of keeping it a secret for two days and worrying me.

After that, I was a little suspicious. I began to notice the same girl calling him. So I secretly checked his Facebook. They have sweet talks, calling each other special names and texting "I miss you".

I don't know how to confront my boyfriend about this. I understand guys flirt but has he crossed the line? I chat with guys too but there are limits. I am going crazy knowing that my boyfriend of four years is doing this every day.

Confused Lady

You really should be worried about your boyfriend's sweet-talking because the signs and symptoms did not point to sleep talking. "I miss you" messages are definitely too intimate to be regarded as being kind and considerate to a friend in need.

Although you are quite wonderful for being able to tolerate flirting, something is not right if your guy has been talking to this girl daily.

Sure, she might be in real need of a friend as she has just broken up. If you are mutual friends, then perhaps you should step in as confidant in partner with your boyfriend. Why allow him to play hero when emotions are volatile and vulnerable? If you love your guy, it's fine to be protective of your own.

Do not try to be too kind and understanding because your boyfriend should respect your feelings too. Keeping secrets, having chats and dates that shut you out is not acceptable.

In every relationship, certain parameters should be set. Unless both are okay with third-party relationships, you have to draw a line. Suspicions, lies and deceit will spell doom for love.

Thelma