The merrymaking season of Christmas might put a frown on the faces of most lonely hearts.
However, the festive season could actually be the best time to ask your crush out on a date.
Violet Lim, 28, founder of local dating agency Lunch Actually, says this is a time when most people are in a good mood, thus boosting your chances of getting a 'yes'.
Besides, as Jennifer Yeo, 33, managing director of Heart2Heart Connect, points out, making the first move with a gift during the season of giving is less likely to draw a negative reaction.
However, do avoid coming on too strong with expensive gifts that could scare your potential date away, she advises.
That the festive calendar is chock-a-block with special events from performances to parties also gives you plenty of date options, says Sue Yeo, 33, managing director of dating consultancy firm Drinks At Eight.
The main hurdle is any prior plans that your crush might have made with his or her family and friends.
You can avoid heartache with some early planning. Lim suggests snooping around to find out what he or she will be up to and creating an opportunity to tag along.
'If you are both invited to the same party, you could suggest meeting beforehand to buy things for the party,' she says.
Or you could simply ask early, with our dating experts suggesting a lead time of between two weeks and a month, which means just about...now.
Urban gets the three dating experts to suggest how a geek, a workaholic and an introvert can mark this season of love.
THE GEEK
You are the techie who can fix a computer bug in a heartbeat but can't figure out the love bug to save your life.
Send out feelers
Websites such as ecrush.com allow you to find out if your crush feels the same about you under a cloak of anonymity, unless there is a mutual match.
Who knows, what is spam to some could be flattery to others.
Get creative
Instead of just an e-mail or e-invite, charm your crush with a customised e-coupon offering the likes of a virtual 'free hot chocolate' or 'Christmas tea' with free online programme eCoupon V2.0 (www.wiwww.net/ecoupon.html).
It says 'I'm genuinely interested' in a novel way.
Say it with music
Send over an MP3 of a cute Christmas ditty or - if you dare - a recording of yourself singing one.
It will certainly get you noticed and you could pass it off as an attempt to spread some Christmas cheer.
Dos and don'ts
Keep it discreet
Don't embarrass your crush by sending out a public message via the likes of Facebook unless you are sure he or she would not mind the attention.
Face better than Facebook
The traditional method of asking someone out is still the best - it is more sincere and ensures that your message gets across accurately.
THE WORKAHOLIC
You are the conscientious worker who spends more time in the office than at the cafeteria, much less in a club.
Grab your chance
It is that time of the year when the office mailbox is crammed with party invites, so sneak yours in as a pleasant surprise.
Outsource the work
Get a florist or gift company to send a simple gift such as flowers or a bottle of wine on your behalf.
Even if your crush is not interested, he or she would probably see it as a thoughtful gesture.
Grab a cuppa
Get an extra cuppa during your coffee break and deliver it to your crush with a note. Note: recommended only for those whose eye candy works in the vicinity - no one likes a stale drink.
Dos and don'ts
Chill out
Don't talk shop or share work woes, especially on the first date, or you risk coming across as a bore.
Get out
Don't mix work and play. Get out of the stressful office zone if you want a fun date.
Plan ahead
Ask your crush out well in advance or risk spending your Christmas mulling over spreadsheets and office accounts.
THE INTROVERT
You are the wallflower who turns the shade of Rudolph's honker whenever your crush walks by.
Keep the pressure off
Ask your crush out for a play, movie or concert. These take the pressure off you to keep the conversation going but gives you something to talk about after.
Bank on company
Invite your crush out to a mutual friend's party. Both of you are less likely to feel awkward and you can always adjourn for one-on-one supper after.
Get talking
Approach your crush for suggestions and comments on, say, gift ideas or festive recipes. It is a subtle way of asking someone out and also shows that you value his or her opinion.
Dos and don'ts
Be yourself
You want your crush to like you for who you are and any pretence will only result in embarrassment later on.
Look smart
You don't need a makeover but make sure you look neat and well-groomed. Remember, first impressions count.
Be confident
You have taken the first step by asking your crush out. Don't ruin your effort by appearing insecure or wary, which can be a turn-off.
This article was first published in Urban, The Straits Times on Dec 5, 2008.
